i am stressed out. period. i'm sweating like a pig and if i was my cat (who i think takes after me sometimes), i'd have shed enough fur to become downright naked.
the reason why i restricted access to my blog is because... i somehow switched back to scribbling in a journal. i found an old unfinished journal lying forgotten in one of the drawers i never open because it contained "special" sentimental things. bla. anyway, i started writing in it again and i felt soo liberated!
with the blog, there were moments when i really wanted to vent out. but i just didnt want random strangers to read, i didn't want to name drop... i just didn't feel comfortable with the 'access' that people had, hence the restricted users. and trust me, you are very few in number.
daddy came home this morning. thats probably the highlight of the day so far. i'm seeing him after almost a year. i took his coat to hang and i couldn't help but sniff a little at the traces of his cologne on it. it smelt so... familiar. the first day daddy's back is always weird. it's like going to the airport to meet an incredibly familiar stranger. and in 3 days bam! our life goes back to (organised) normal.
i've already thrown two tantrums so far. first on the phone yelling to my favorite band members for an interview that was published in another publication with content that was similar to the one i was about to publish. by the end of it i felt incredibly stupid. they had given the interview almost a year back and weren't aware of it's date of publication plus, mine's still better. got scolded by ancient critic friend for being "reactive" and making "a mountain out of a mole hill".
then media coordinator friend calls up, he had gotten in trouble because of a royal bitch who had decided to interfere with media coordination because she for god knows what reason is hell-bent on making my life miserable. her interference caused my publication not to cover the event he had called me for and he got it from his boss, big time. anyway, i tell him the proper procedure for working with press and what he needs to do (officially) in order to make sure he's gone through the formalities of getting an event covered. and i know i've said this 10 gazillion times, but:
event organisers/musicians/people who journalists write about... do NOT get to pick their own artistes. the editorial team does. so PLEASE send your cds/albums/invitations to the editorial office but do NOT think you can dictate what journalist will write about you.
*phew*
i really don't know how one can survive in this industry without getting entangled in "politics" or remaining clean. i want to remain clean. i do not want to fight with anyone. i want my own peace. thank you.
